


To Get Back To You

by dvg



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Crimes & Criminals, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Reunions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-03
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:13:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 20,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25694089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dvg/pseuds/dvg
Summary: What if Robert never cut off contact, and it was all just for show to trap Lee's real killer?
Relationships: Aaron Dingle/Robert Sugden
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> re-post of my final reunion fic.

**_February 19, 2022_ **

He hadn’t known how completely a heart could shatter. He thought he knew. When his marriage had ended, Aaron had been certain he would never grieve in quite the same way again.

He had been right, he thought now and pressed both hands to the ache in his heart. This was different. This was worse.

His feelings for Robert hadn’t eroded so slowly over the years that there had barely been any left by the time it was over. But this… He squeezed his eyes tight, and though the air was still and warm, he shuddered.

He’d never loved anyone the way he’d loved Robert. Wildly, outrageously. Brutally. And all those feelings were still fresh. Discovering he could feel again, realizing he could want and be wanted again both scared him and made him feel alive.

He still admired Robert, what he’d made of himself since he’d been in prison, and he had fallen back in love with every part of him, the rough and dangerous man and the kind and gentle one within that he never showed to anybody else.

But now he was stuck in another predicament, one he didn’t know how to get himself out of. Their hope for a future together was being threatened once again.

“Mr. Dingle, do you want to make a statement?”

_ That's Mr. Sugden-Dingle, you pompous ass. _

Aaron remained still, his hands resting on his thighs, his shoulder back. He’d been in the Hotten P.D. interrogation room for the better part of an hour and hadn’t said a word.

He wanted this over, but there was nothing he could do.

“Mr. Dingle,” Detective Hollands repeated, “Mr. Balon was murdered last night and you have nothing to say?”

Oh, he had a lot to say, the first being he didn’t kill Liam, but if he’d learned anything from being in trouble with the law in this past, it was to keep to his trap shut. “Not until my lawyer gets here.”

An alien sensation settled on him. Shock? Disbelief? Maybe even sadness. He may have wanted to end the nightmare that had turned into his life, but murder? Not like this.

In his worst bout of rage, he wouldn’t have gone that far. He had too much to lose, especially now.

Right now, the only thing Aaron knew was that these two detectives banged on his door at 8:00 a.m. to haul his ass in for questioning.

He flicked a glance at the two-way mirror behind Holland’s head. The room’s barren white walls and faded, sickening stench of fear-laced sweat made Aaron’s fingers twitch. He’d keep his hands hidden from view. No sense letting his nerves show. Or the silver wedding band on his left hand.

The side door flew open and smacked against the wall with a  _ thwap _ . Holland and his younger partner, Dowe, shifted to see Aaron’s lawyer storm in wearing a slick grey suit.

Michael Wright set his briefcase on the metal table. “Is he under arrest?”

“Not yet,” Holland said.

“Do you have anything to hold him?” Michael held up a hand and his diamond ring flashed against the overhead light. “Wait. Let me rephrase. Do you have anything to hold him on that I won’t shred in the next two hours?”

The room stayed quiet.

Michael turned to Aaron. “Have you said anything?”

“No.”

Michael jerked his head without dislodging even one strand of his gelled gray hair. “Good. Let’s go.”

_ Thank you. _

Before Aaron could move from his chair, Holland stood. “We’re not done.”

Michael stopped in the doorway, spun around. “Charge him then.”

Again the room went silent and Aaron broke a sweat. The idea of being locked up again scared the hell out of him. Holland’s face took on the tight look of a balloon about to burst and Aaron let out a breath.

Michael pointed to the door. “We’re leaving.”

Once outside the police station, the late March wind slammed into Aaron and he sucked in air as if he’d been without it for months. “I didn’t do it.”

“You’re being set up.”

“Someone found out who he really was,” Aaron said. “And now they’re trying to frame me for his death cause they were the ones really responsible for Lee’s death.”

“My job is to keep you out of prison,” Michael said. “Not just because your husband paid me to make sure of that, but I owe him. He saved my life years ago. When I was afraid to come out, he talked to me. He didn’t even know who he was back then, but he was my friend and he let me know it was okay to be me. I’ve never forgotten that.”

“How is he?”

“Worried about his husband.” Michael had believed in Robert’s innocence from the minute he had laid eyes on Robert again after he’d been transferred prisons. With Aaron’s help, they were finally on the right track, but now they were at a standstill again after the mysterious death of Liam, the man Aaron was sure had been hired by the Posners to kill Lee and frame Robert.

“Tell him I’m fine.”

“He’ll only believe that if I keep you out of prison.”

“What now?”

“We go back to my office and you tell me what happened. Your last conversation with Liam, how you find him when you found him. We had time before, but we’re running out now that he’s dead. Now not only do we have Robert’s innocence to prove, but yours too.”

“I should have known it was a bad idea getting involved with Liam. Leading him, making everybody believe we were a couple.”

“But?”

“But I would have done anything to prove Robert is innocent. Anything.” But he hadn’t liked it. Not one minute of it, and he knew Robert hadn’t either.

“But you wouldn’t have killed him. He was the one key to what really happened.”

Aaron stared at Michael, his eyes full of vengeance and pain. “I might have, that’s how angry I am for what that family has put us through, but what good would that have done? I would have ended up back in prison. Then what’s the point of Robert being released? I would just lose him again, and I’m not going to let that happen. We’ve come too far, worked too hard to let anything else tear us apart.”

* * *

“It’s all over the news,” Chas said, pressing the button on the television remote. The picture of Aaron being dragged into the police station disappeared. “Aaron was arrested for Liam’s murder. I don’t believe this.”

“Has he been charged?” Paddy asked, worry furrowing his brows.

“He’s only been questioned. Aaron just texted that he’s been released. He’s on his way home.”

“Does he have an alibi?”

“He says he was home alone.”

“I can’t believe it. I know they have been fighting a lot lately, but Aaron is incapable of killing anyone.”

“We never thought Robert was capable of murder either and look what happened.”

“Robert didn’t kill anyone and neither did I.” Aaron stood in the doorway, his body rigid. He was literally frozen.

Chas shot out of her chair and wrapped her arms around Aaron. “I’m so glad you’re okay. When Michael told me you had been arrested and I saw you on the TV in handcuffs, I imagined all sorts of horrible things…”

“I didn’t kill him, mum.” Aaron held her at arm’s length. “And Robert didn’t kill Lee.” He’d kept this secret for almost two years. “I’ve been working with Robert and his lawyer for the past year trying to prove his innocence. Liam was the key.” He sighed, defeated. “Now he’s dead and we’ve lost our chance to prove it. I can’t let him stay rotting in there for something he didn’t do.”

“What are you talking about?” Paddy said. Aaron hadn’t mentioned Robert in months.

“This doesn’t make any sense,” Chas said. “You and Robert have been divorced for over a year, and I thought you haven’t spoken to him. He cut you out of his life so you could move on with your life.”

“That was all a lie. All of it. I had to pretend that we were over, that we were divorced if we had any shot of our plan working.”

“All of it was a lie?” Chas repeated.

Aaron shook his head. “We never got divorced, he never cut me out. Well, he tried to for a few weeks after he first got transferred, but then I went down to see him. And we talked. We talked a lot. I wasn’t going to let him cut me out completely. I love him too much, and I knew he loved me, he was just being stubborn.”

“I can’t believe I’m hearing any of this,” Chas said. “You’ve been with Liam for three months now.”

“Just pretend,” Aaron said, then shuddered. Just the thought of him and Liam as a real couple went his stomach turn. “I did what I had to do to get him to open up, to get the evidence I needed to get Robert released. I was finally getting somewhere he was so close to admitting that it was him that killed Lee.”

“But why would he kill Lee? He didn’t even know him,” Paddy said.

“Liam knew Wendy. I’ve been digging into her past for the last two years. I finally started to put all of the pieces together. Liam was starting to open up to me. The night before he died he told me he had something he wanted to tell me, a secret he’d been keeping. I’ve spent the last few months convincing Liam that I hated Robert, that I was glad he was in prison. It was the only way Liam would feel comfortable enough to open up to me without worrying that Robert was a threat.”

He had to endure two years of missing Robert, of living without him. Two years he’d spent alone because his husband had been locked off for a crime he didn’t commit.

_ Breathe. One, two, three. Stay calm. You’ve got this. This isn’t over. _

Chas held up a hand. “Are you telling me you’ve been risking your life just to try and prove Wendy was involved in Lee’s death? Aaron, we all know she’s dangerous. If what you say is true and she hired Liam to kill Lee, and now he’s dead, you know that makes her even more dangerous.”

“I don’t care,” Aaron said. “The only thing I care about is making sure Robert gets out of prison. He should never have been there in the first place. I need him home, mum. I need him.”

Nothing about Aaron’s statement surprised Chas, or Paddy. “When you got together with Liam, I thought you had finally gotten over Robert.”

“Something always seemed off about it,” Paddy admitted. “You never looked happy. I thought that would change in time but looking back now it’s obvious.”

“It made me sick just looking at him.” Aaron rubbed his hands over his face. “Robert didn’t like it either, but it was our only option.”

“What can we do to help?” Paddy said. “This isn’t going to be the end of you being questioned. You’re going to be the prime suspect, especially after the public fight the two of you had in the pub the other night.”

“I know.” Aaron sighed. His problems just kept mounting. “Michael’s going to the prison to update Robert. I wish I could be there. I just want to see him. I need him to tell me it’s going to be alright, but I can’t. I’m under suspicion for Liam’s murder and if the police catch me driving up to the prison, the cat’s out of the bag and we’re out of options. Game over.”

“Then tell us what we can do. Let us help you prove Wendy is behind this.”

For the first time in twenty-four hours, Aaron felt a tiny ray of hope. “I have a plan. Can you meet me at my place later?”

“Of course, Aaron. Whatever you need, we’re there for you,” Paddy said. A lot had changed in the past two years, he thought, but not Aaron’s love for Robert, and not his own for the man he considered to be his son.

Aaron remained silent, at a loss for words, as tears rolled down his cheeks. Unfazed by the sudden show of emotion, he wiped at them with his thumb. “I can’t lose him, not again. I couldn’t handle it.”

“And you’re not going to,” Chas promised him. “We’ll help you.”


	2. Chapter 2

Michael parked his black Escalade and made his way into the prison. After going through security and down a long narrow hallway, he was shown inside a small square room with concrete floors and a table in the middle of the room.

His client was already waiting for him, sitting at the table with his hands clenched together, a forlorn look on his face.

“Please tell me they haven’t charged him,” Robert said.

“Not yet.” Michael put his briefcase on the table and took the chair across from Robert. “So far he’s just been questioned, which he handled just the way I expected. I had a briefing with him afterward. I know he didn’t kill Liam, but it doesn’t look good. They had an argument in the pub a few nights ago, then one night later the guy is dead. And with Aaron’s history, his track record with violence, the police are only looking at him.”

“He didn’t want to come to see me?”

“He wanted to come down with me, but the cops are tracking him. He couldn’t risk it. He wanted to be here, to see you.” Michael took a piece of paper from his jacket pocket, handed it to Robert. “I know it’s not the same as seeing him, but he wanted me to give you this.”

He would read it later, Robert thought, tucking the note into his prison jumpsuit. When he was alone.

The instant throbbing behind his eyes warned of his firing temper and he stood to release some energy in the small room. “I’m worried about him. He can’t go back to prison. He barely survived the first time.”

“There’s something else you should know.”

“What?” Robert’s face fell.

He looked miserable, Michael thought. “If this morning is any indication, the P.D. is bent on him going to prison.”

Robert curled his fingers into a tight fist until his knuckles ached from the pressure. “Then we have to find a way to prove Aaron didn’t kill him. We both know who was responsible; the same person who's responsible for putting me in here.”

“They’re morons,” Michael said. “It just doesn’t make sense. Why would Aaron kill him? In a fit of a rage maybe, but they weren’t in a serious relationship. The cops know Aaron didn’t kill him. They just don’t care. He’s their most likely suspect so they’ll work that angle until they break him down enough that he’ll confess.”

“He’s not guilty,” Robert said through clenched teeth. “I won’t let him go through this. There’s got to be something we can do to get Wendy to confess before it comes to that. She needs to be locked up before someone else gets hurt.”

“The P.D. is only interested in hearing a confession. If we don’t want Aaron charged with murder, we have to find out on our own who killed Liam. I already have a private investigator lined up.” Michael reached across the table and patted Robert’s hand as a show of support and faith. “He’s not going to go to prison, and we’re going to get you out of here. It’s just going to take a bit longer than we thought. I promise you, I’m going to do everything I can to help you and Aaron get out of this mess.”

A lump the size of a tennis ball wedged in Robert’s throat. “I’m just worried about him. I never should have let him get involved with Liam in the first place. If he had just left it alone, he wouldn’t be in this predicament now. When he’s involved me with me he always gets hurt or in trouble. He’s better off without me.”

Michael shook his head. “He told me you would say something like that. He was never going to give up on you. He was willing to do anything to get you out of here. If that’s not someone in love, I don’t know what is. We’re going to clear him, Rob, and we’re going to clear you. Then you’ll both move on with your lives and not look back.”

Robert knew about anger and how it could nibble away at your insides until all that was left was a gaping hole. Spending the rest of his life in prison wasn’t an option, not when Aaron was still out there fighting for him, loving him, standing by him. And he was going to do the same for him, from behind prison bars, using whatever ammunition he had at his disposal.

This was a fight they were going to win, whatever the hell he had to do.

“I’m not sorry he’s dead,” Robert said. “I hated thinking about him and Aaron together, especially knowing he was a cold-blooded murderer. I know Lee was a bastard, but he didn’t deserve to die. Not by a calculated monster, his own mother for god sakes. And if Liam was the one she hired to do her dirty work, the longer it takes to get her behind bars.”

“You’re worried she could come after Aaron.”

The thought had crossed his mind, more than once. It scared the hell out of him. “And there’s nothing I can do to protect him from here.”

“He knows how to take care of himself.”

“Doesn’t stop me from worrying, does it?”

“You love him, it’s perfectly normal to worry. He’s been the same about you. Every time I talk to you he asks me how you are.”

“Weird isn’t it? I tried so hard to push him away because I wanted him to have a better life. And now once again because of me, he’s in danger.”

“He walked into this with his eyes wide open. And he was doing a damn good job. Liam was just about to confess to him until the idiot went and got himself killed. There’s nothing we can do about it now. Now we have to concentrate our efforts on clearing his name and getting Wendy to confess.”

Grief settled on Robert as he remembered the last words Aaron had said to him. A rippling sensation charged up his spine, gripping harder and harder until it reached his throat and caught.

Aaron had been exposed and vulnerable, but he tried to pull himself together as he looked at his husband across the table in the visiting room a week before. “Rob, I hate this,” Aaron had said, his fingers trembling as they gripped Robert’s. “Every time he kisses me I just want to punch him in the face.” Repulsed at the thought, Aaron shook his head to get rid of the memory. “It makes me sick. But we’re getting close. Just a few more weeks of this charade and we’ll have you out of here, back home where you belong.”

Now the hope of ever going back home was slipping further and further away from him.

He just wanted Aaron to be okay.

He wanted to be back home, protecting Aaron from the heartless bitch that was responsible for wrecking their lives.

The anger and frustration was becoming too consuming. He would have sacrificed anything, even his own life, to protect Aaron. No matter the cost.

“We’re getting a good head start. I’ll check in with my investigator once I get back to the office. We’re going to sort this out, Rob, you just have to have faith.”

Robert trusted Michael with his life, he had no other choice, so he nodded. There wasn’t much else he could do from behind bars but trust that despite all the obstacles they were facing that the truth would prevail, one way or another, and he would finally get justice.

“Thank you, Mike. I appreciate everything you’ve done. Whatever happens, I’m grateful.”

Back in his cell, Robert pulled out the note from Aaron.

_ Sorry I couldn’t be there today. I really wanted to see you. I miss you so much. I’m sure you’ve heard what happened, but don’t worry I’m fine. The cops aren’t going to break me. I’ve told you more than once that I’ll fight, I’ll do whatever it takes to get you home. Looks like I’ll have to fight a little harder, but we’re going to figure this out. I told my mum and Paddy about us today. I thought they would think I was off my head, but they surprised me. They’re going to help us. You have more people on your side than you realize. Maybe now you’ll realize just how stupid you were being when you were trying to get rid of me. Like you ever could haha. I don’t know when I’ll be able to come and see you, probably not until Liam’s murder is cleared up. Just remember that I love you and that I’m never giving up on you. We’re going to get that bitch, I promise you. I love you, husband. _

Robert glanced at the photos that hung above his bed. The one from their second wedding that had been taken during a private moment that they hadn’t realized the photographer had captured. They had their arms around each other and they were laughing. About what he couldn’t remember. But it was Aaron’s smile in the photograph that kept him going. He placed his finger over Aaron’s face. “I love you too,” he murmured before he laid down on his cot and closed his eyes. “I’ll see you soon.”

* * *

He knew Aaron would come. There was no way to avoid or prevent it.

It was only worse now. He’d nearly talked himself out of his earlier decision, had told himself they could find a way to still make this work. The visit from Michael had snapped things back into reality.

He would make it clean, he would make it quick.

Aaron would be hurt. There was no way to avoid or prevent that either.

He hadn’t expected Aaron to come so soon. After his interrogation at the police station, Robert thought it would have been harder for Aaron to get away from the scrutiny, the prying eyes. He would still be being watched, his every move analyzed.

He hadn’t expected himself to be so unprepared when he saw Aaron standing in the doorway of the small room. Aaron’s eyes were warm, but they looked sad, beaten down.

“I wore a disguise to keep anyone from noticing me leave,” Aaron began. He knew he was talking quickly, bubbling over with nerves. Something was wrong. He could have been deaf and blind and still have sensed it. “I thought you’d be happy to see me. It’s been two weeks.”

“I am happy to see you, believe me. I’ve been worried about you as soon as Mike told me what happened. Are you alright?”

“Other than being hounded by the cops, I’m great,” Aaron said dryly, not waiting for an invitation to step farther inside the room with the concrete floors and green walls.

Robert’s voice was cool and careless. “You shouldn’t have come.”

Fighting panic, Aaron paced the small space, keeping his hands in the pocket of his jacket so he wouldn’t give in to the urge to grab Robert’s face like he wanted to. He looked at Robert and couldn’t prevent himself from leading with his heart. “I really missed you. So much.”

Aaron was halfway across the room, reaching for Robert. Robert could all but feel Aaron’s embrace. Robert stepped back, lifted both hands to ward him off.

“What is it, Robert?” Aaron’s stomach jittered, echoed in his voice. “Are you angry with me?”

Deliberately Robert tilted his head. “Why do you do that? Why do you always assume that whatever’s going on around you is your fault or your responsibility? Do I look mad at you?”

“No.” Aaron folded his hands, gathered his composure. “No, you don’t. You look annoyed that I’m here. I thought you wanted me to come, that you wanted to see me.”

“Aaron, we can’t keep doing this. I’m not getting out of here anytime soon and you’re under suspicion for murder. This has to be the last time you come here.”

He would breathe, Aaron told himself. However tight the fist was around his heart, he would breathe, slow and easy. “You don’t mean that.”

“Liam being killed changed our plans. I would love to tell you that it didn’t, but we’d both be lying. I won’t let you be implicated in something that had nothing to do with you. I know you didn’t kill him, but you were involved with him, and you’re going to be the primary suspect until they find the real killer.”

“We both know who the real killer is,” Aaron said angrily. “I’m not giving up. Just because Liam is dead doesn’t mean we still can’t prove Wendy is behind all of this.”

“I love you, you know that.” In this at least, he didn’t have to improvise. “I’m trying to protect you.”

“Stop trying to do that,” Aaron snapped. “You tried to do that before and look at what happened and look where we ended up. I came here and I banged on the damn door until they let me in to see you. It took a bit of convincing you, but you finally saw sense.”

“Aaron, I’m not changing my mind about this. After today you can’t come back here. I won’t let you. You’ll get over it.”

“I’ll get over it.” Aaron stepped towards him. “You can’t honestly believe that. After everything we’ve been through.”

“Don’t lay the guilt trip on me.”

“That’s it, is it?” Aaron drew in another breath, but it wasn’t slow and it wasn’t easy. “See you around, it’s been fun? You mean nothing to me? How dare you! How dare you lower what we have, what we feel for each other?”

It wasn’t going to be quick and clean, it was going to be messy. He thought he could do this, he thought he could let Aaron go. But he couldn’t. It was just too damn hard. Aaron, he thought, was everything. He couldn’t just let him walk away, even if he knew it was the right thing to do. He had thought that before too and that hadn’t done anything but make the two of them miserable and kept them apart.

He wouldn’t stay away, Aaron thought. It was impossible. He would do anything for Robert, but not this. He stood at the only window in the room, stared off into space.

Aaron was the strongest man he had ever known, Robert thought as he watched his husband. When Aaron turned back around to look at him, he looked indestructible.

To keep his hands still, Robert linked them in his lap. “I just wanted to protect you, and I can’t do that from this stupid place. I’ve asked Mike to keep an eye on things, to make sure you’re alright. If someone went to great lengths to keep their secret and killed Liam, you could be next on the list. I thought if you kept coming here that it would start becoming more and more obvious to whoever is behind this what’s going on with us and figure it all out. I’m just trying to keep you from getting killed.”

“I know what I’m doing,” Aaron said. “I have a new plan, and it sure as hell doesn’t include me giving you up. Don’t ask me to cause I won’t.”

“It could have easily been you,” Robert said in a small voice that surprised even him. “If you get killed I would never forgive myself. You were already taking a huge risk by getting involved with Liam. Wendy has to have eyes and ears everywhere around the village. By now she knows that we were trying to set her up to get to the truth.”

“So I go back home and implement my new plan. I have help this time. My mum and Paddy and even Vic. I had to tell our family, Rob,” Aaron said when he saw the panic flash in Robert’s eyes. “We need help if we’re going to get her, and they can help. They hate her as much as we do.”

Robert’s eyes, swimming with emotion, met Aaron’s. “I love you and I don’t want to lose you. That scares me more than me having to spend the rest of my life here.”

“You’re not going to. We’re going to prove you weren't responsible for Lee's death. When we do, you're going to come home to me and there are a million things I have planned for you when you do.”

“I’ve made so many mistakes, Aaron. I’m not sure I’m going to get away with this one.”

“You were never one to give up, no matter what got in the way. We have a chance, Rob. A real chance to prove your innocence. If I have to risk my life to do it, I will and nothing you can say is going to make me change my mind. And you trying to pretend you don’t love me anymore is the stupidest thing you could say to me right now. I never believed you when you tried that line before, I’m certainly not going to fall for it now.”

“I was trying to make things easier for you, but I guess this time even I could see through the lies.”

“Good, so next time just save your breath. Now, come here.” Aaron walked to Robert, grabbed him by the hair, and crushed their lips together. Robert lifted his hands, dropped them again, then gave up and crushed Aaron against him. Aaron’s body was still vibrating with fury, but his mouth was soft and pliant.

Saying nothing, Robert yanked him close again and broke. Shuddering, he buried his face in Aaron’s neck, fought to find his breath. “I love you. So much.”

Every drop of temper drained out of Aaron as he stroked Robert’s back. “I love you, too.” He cupped Robert’s face in his hands and studied those dark, stormy eyes. “I never stopped.”

Robert stood where he was, watching all of those violent emotions flit over Aaron’s face. “It scares me,” he admitted. “But I know there’s no other way. But losing you is not an option.”

“You pretend to be such a tough guy,” Aaron murmured, touching his cheek. “But you’re such a soft touch. When I walked in here tonight, you were going to let me go. You were going to give me no choice.”

“I’m no match for you,” Robert murmured. “I don’t deserve you.”

“Well, tough. You’re stuck with it. Nothing you could ever do would make me give up on us. That’s one thing I’ve learned in the past two years. There’s no one else. There never has been and there never will be.” Aaron pulled the silver chain out from around his neck, where their two silver wedding bands shone. “I meant every word I said to you that day. For better or worse, I’ll be there for you, until my dying day. No matter what."

Robert wondered if he was going to be able to speak, how any man could after words like that. “It was never supposed to be like this, and I’m sorry this is where we are now."

Aaron took his hand, not gently but possessively, his battered fingers clamping onto Robert’s. “I mean it Rob, no running away this time. I know we can get through this, we can prove you’re innocent, but I can’t do it alone.”

Robert cupped Aaron’s face in his hands, kissed him one more time. “No more running. I promise.”


	3. Chapter 3

_**Robert's Journal - Monday, March 7th, 2022** _

Not a day has passed in the last two years that I haven’t remembered those last moments with Aaron before I surrendered to the cops and was led away in handcuffs and locked up. Not a day goes by that I don't remember what it felt like in that room, our own private sanctuary, to make love for what I knew was the last time. I had resigned myself to the fact that I was going to spend the rest of my life behind bars, that I would never be free to live the life Aaron and I had planned.

I knew I was letting him go that morning. It was slowly killing me, but I needed to put him first. He didn't deserve a life like this.

Since that day, my inability to save Aaron from this hell has tortured me. It was never supposed to be this way for him. I wanted him to move on, to be happy. I knew it would be hard for him to let go, but he’s the strongest person I know. I thought he would be okay.

Then the guard, Susan, I think that was her name, came to my cell at the beginning of January, 2020. I had only served two months of my sentence at that point. She handed me a letter, it was scrunched up but still legible. I recognized Aaron’s messy scribble right away. I remember Susan looking at me and smiling. She told me that Aaron had refused to leave the prison without speaking to me, but that she had done as I asked and told him that I didn’t want to see anybody.

I should have known better. I know him better than anyone else does. He came back two days later and this time he wasn’t taking no for an answer.

When I finally agreed to see him in person, one time only I had promised myself, to sign the divorce papers and say goodbye one final time. I owed him that much. But then I walked into that tiny little room and saw him. Me in my prison jumpsuit and Aaron looking absolutely gorgeous in a black suit. Damn him.

I was a goner there and then. And he knew it.

So yeah, we didn’t sign divorce papers that day. In fact, we tore them up. I told Aaron I loved him, he called me an idiot.

He told me to dull his pain he had a few random hookups. I didn’t have any right to be jealous, but I was. He knew it, too.

I don’t remember a lot of what else was spoken between us that day. All I can remember is Aaron never giving up on me, holding those divorce papers in front of my face and asking me if this is really all he meant to me after all our years together.

I couldn’t lie anymore, I couldn’t pretend that it was what I wanted.

Because it was the last thing I wanted. But I couldn’t ask him to spend the next fourteen years of his life visiting me here then going back home to an empty bed. But then he said something that I’ll never forget. He told me that he’d rather have a few hours a week just seeing my face, even if it was behind prison walls, then spend the rest of his life trying to find something that would never compare. He begged me to not throw us away just because of some stupid prison sentence, that we meant more to each other than that.

I remembered laughing at that. It was the first time I had laughed since being banged up.

I remember burying my head against his shoulder and promising that I would stop trying to push him away.

That was over a year ago. It feels strange to say this, but I don’t think our relationship has ever been stronger. He visits once a week, sometimes in exchange for an extra visit twice a month I put in some time working in the prison kitchen.

About six months ago Aaron got some inside information from Cain who apparently had been doing some digging on his own, that the medical records at the hospital had been tampered with. Don’t ask me how he found this out, he has his ways. He’s a sneaky little bastard, but he always comes through for family. Apparently he obtained some information – not legally – that Wendy Posner has a history of covering up crimes. She had a daughter who was raped and allegedly the man who molested her died under mysterious circumstances. Cyanide poisoning turned out to be the official cause of death, and Wendy’s daughter had been under suspicion but was quickly exonerated of all charges. Six months later Wendy’s daughter left town and was living under a new assumed name in a different county. There were whispers around their old town that Wendy had paid someone to get rid of her daughter’s rapist because her daughter was petrified of testifying against him in the court.

So that’s how this whole thing started. When this Liam came to the village, Cain got a bad feeling about him and did some more digging. It turns out Liam dated Wendy’s daughter at some point during her college days and was sort of a lifetime criminal, mainly dealing drugs to underage teens. He’d spent ten years in prison but never seemed to turn his life around. Instead, he had taken to burglarizing homes and businesses to pay for his cocaine habit.

Cain went to Aaron with his suspicions. They had both already suspected Wendy had arranged to have Lee killed, but I still had a hard time believing it. Why would she kill her own son?

Turns out that apparently she wasn’t all that happy about having a rapist for a son, especially after what her daughter had endured. This daughter was Wendy’s pride and joy, and Lee was nothing but a disappointment.

She put on a good act the way she always went on and on about how great Lee was, how he would never hurt anyone. I think back to how harsh she was to Victoria when Vic came forward about being raped. Wendy pretended to be so adamant that her precious son would never have done such a thing.

Bullshit.

So we came up with a plan, me, Aaron and Cain and Michael, to lure Wendy into a trap by using Liam. Aaron would befriend him, romance him if it came down to it, which unfortunately it did, and get him to admit the truth. And god, we were so close. Liam was so close to cracking. Aaron was getting under his skin. I know it was just an act, and Aaron had to do it, but the image of Aaron kissing the bastard made me feel sick to my stomach. I just had to remember that Aaron was doing this for me, for us, to get me set free. But I still hated it.

Two nights before Liam was murdered, he had a shouting match with Aaron in the middle of the pub. Aaron’s never told me what it was about, but according to Michael, it had something to do with Liam being angry because Aaron wouldn’t “go all the way” with him and he claimed that Aaron was still hung up on me, his ex-husband, who deserved to die for what he did.

I don’t really care what Liam thought about me. He didn’t know me, he didn’t even know Aaron.

The night before he died, Liam told Aaron he had a dark secret, something big that he was privy to that could change Aaron's life. He was going to tell Aaron the next day, but he never got around to it because the next morning Aaron found his dead body in our house.

Our house for god sake. Wendy had Liam killed at the Mill.

Unfuckingbelievable. When I get my hands on that cow...

But because of that public fight in the pub, Aaron is the number one suspect in Liam’s murder. Of course, no one is looking at Wendy because no one but us knows that she's connected to him, that she is the one that brought him to the village to do her dirty work for her so her hands can stay clean.

We know who is behind the scenes pulling the strings.

Wendy fucking Posner.

I haven’t seen Aaron in the two weeks after he was questioned by the police, except for the one time he put on a ridiculous disguise to visit to let me know he was fine, that he was handling it. And I tried to play the hero, offering Aaron another out. I was being stubborn – yes, again – telling him that he had to stop coming to see me, that we couldn’t keep doing this. I was giving up – yes, again – I just couldn’t see a scenario where this ended well for either of us if we kept holding on.

But as usual, Aaron tore down my walls, made me see that we could still have that future we always talked about.

Losing Aaron the first time had fueled a kaleidoscope of dark thoughts. I couldn’t go back there. I’m nothing if I don’t have him, and it took me years to finally admit that.

Liam’s death wasn’t going to be the end for us. We have people fighting for us. Not just us, but for me. Our family, our friends. Aaron’s family who once hated me, thought I was the worst possible person for him. They’re in our corner now, and they’ve been working tirelessly to help us plant this trap to lure Wendy into, so we can finally end this nightmare.

I have a letter from Aaron I haven’t opened yet. I’ve been impatiently waiting for the right time to open it and read it. He’s been on edge lately and can’t say I blame him. We haven’t been able to see each other, and I know it has to stay that way until he gets cleared of any suspicion in Liam’s death. We can’t risk the police finding out we’re still married or that Aaron and I still talk to each other. I had to tell the guards and everyone else here that Aaron and I are over, that he’s with someone else.

It’s the only way. For now.

I just miss him so much.

We’re getting close – finally. Michael came to see me yesterday and filled me in on the progress of his private investigator’s investigation into Wendy and her messed-up family.

Yeah, apparently it’s not just Lee that is fucked up. There’s a whole sling of family members who are involved with illegal dealings and who are experts in covering things up. But we’re slowly uncovering them all, and pretty soon Wendy Posner is going to regret messing with the Dingles.

Weird, isn’t it? That I now consider myself a Dingle. But I do.


	4. Chapter 4

It was quiet and dark outside, the clouds were low and a drizzle was cloaking the city, traffic a watery blur behind the rain-streaked windows.

He sat at a computer station at the back of the room, the bill of his ball cap pulled low over his brow. His clothing was purposefully generic - denim jacket, jeans, work boots. Leeds wasn't too far from his ultimate destination, and it was a landscape into which he could blend into effortlessly.

He opened up a social media page and scanned for new posts. 

Nothing that interested him.

He clicked open another page, and then another. For his own social media profile, he'd uploaded a photo of a dark-haired middle-aged man that only somewhat resembled himself that he'd stolen from someone else's profile. It was the same image he used on all of his other social media pages.

Computer proficiency was something he'd accomplished while doing time for involuntary manslaughter. In prison, he'd also learned from an inmate about trolling other social media pages to find his next victim. He'd had no access to the internet while inside, but upon his release, he immediately conducted a traditional internet search for "Aaron Dingle" and "Robert Sugden", his primary targets. There were countless newspaper articles, feature stories that mentioned Robert, and his involvement in Lee Posner's death and his subsequent arrest. After he was sentenced and locked away, the mention of his name seemed to have come to a screeching halt. As if he no longer existed.

There wasn't much on Aaron Dingle, the man's husband. He had been convinced that Aaron had changed his name, taken on a new identity, like Ashley had, or was simply trying to hide.

More likely embarrassed at having a murderer for a husband.

The information he did manage to find was scarce. Owned a scrap company, has lived in Emmerdale for most of his life, married to Robert Sugden, murderer. A few brushes with the law including time in prison for GBH. And his father was convicted of raping him when he was a child.

He knew most of that already from Wendy herself. She liked to know every little detail about the people she felt were getting in the way.

She had contacted him months ago about a job she needed his expertise for. To permanently get rid of another person trying to interfere with her plans.

He sighed. First it was Lee she paid him to kill, now this Liam character who had a big mouth and was too close to revealing their secret.

He had relished in killing Lee, he thought. The bastard had deserved to die. But Liam, he felt guilty about that. The guy just had the bad luck of getting involved with the wrong people. Namely, Wendy Posner.

Now Liam's murder was raising new questions, and Aaron Dingle wasn't the only suspect on the cop's radar. He had to act fast.

Aaron Dingle was his prey now. He knew the man was digging into Wendy's past, and if he kept digging, the truth was going to come out and it would be game over for both of them.

He couldn't go back to prison.

He would die first.

He had stalked Aaron for a few weeks, lurked in the shadows, following him wherever he went, holding his place. Waiting for the right moment to strike.

He stilled as something snared his attention. His cell phone.

_ Aaron is getting closer. to the truth, You need to deal with him. Now. _

He rubbed the whiskers on his jaw - the hair dye irritated his skin. 

Why couldn't Aaron just have moved on or gotten himself killed? Why couldn't he have just left well enough alone?

He heard the stories, and the rumors about Aaron and Robert Sugden. How they met - it all started with an affair - their two marriages - wasn't one enough? - they were happily married when Robert decided to swing a shovel and bash Lee's skull in. 

Idiot, he thought. 

If only Lee had died because of those injuries inflicted by Sugden, he wouldn't have had to take this job, he wouldn't have had been forced to kill two people to cover up Wendy's crimes.

But a hunter, a good hunter, possessed patience, he reminded himself. She had paid well - his services didn't come cheap. He trusted his gut and he always knew the mind and habits of his prey.

He studied Aaron for the past three weeks, watched his every move. He knew the guy had gone down to the prison where his ex-husband was currently serving his prison sentence. But why?

Why would he want to visit his ex-husband who had divorced him the minute he was behind bars, who had tossed him aside without a second thought? He didn't understand it. He thought Aaron was a fool. And a lovesick one at that. It was disgusting. He would enjoy watching him die.

Wendy was being paranoid, insisting that he move up his timeline and kill Aaron tonight. He'd been prolonging it, trying to placate her with empty promises that he would do it when the time was right.

He had a bad feeling.

He had tried once, two days ago. From his hiding places in the bushes outside of Aaron's house, he had fired. And missed. He'd only wounded Aaron. Then Aaron had slipped into the black.

He had lost him.

But he felt in his bones that after a few days he would reappear again and he'd have another chance.

One look at Aaron's social media page told him exactly where he was heading.

A cabin in the woods.

It would be a powerful lure. His heart kicked into gear as he typed back a reply to Wendy.

_ He's gone camping with his uncle. This is the perfect opportunity to get revenge. _

He was an expert adept at tracking both animal and man. He could feel the excitement piquing in his bones as he jotted down the address to the cabin that he found on Aaron's uncle's social media page.

_ Spending a few days in the woods just me and my nephew after a long week at the garage. Hopefully, we'll catch a few fish and enjoy a few beers while we're out here.  _

_ Challenge accepted _ , he whispered to himself.  _ Got you right where I want you. You won't even see me coming. _

A soft blush of adrenaline heated his blood as he noticed someone commented under the post.

_ Bring back some trout _ posted by Chas Dingle.

Aaron's mum, he thought. Wendy despised her. But there weren't many people that Wendy didn't despise.

He clicked on Chas' profile and scrolled down to her profile picture. It was a picture of her and Aaron.

_ How sweet _ .

Not. His own mother had abandoned him years ago. A memory snaked suddenly through his mind, drawing him back in time.

_ You're worthless, lazy, and a complete waste of space. Get out of my house now! _

No, there was no love lost between him and his mother. She was dead to him.

The mother and son relationship was a joke. A fucking joke.

His heart slammed against his ribs. He couldn't breathe.

It was time.

He was almost blinded by an injection of pure hot adrenaline. Another message from Wendy.

_ No turning back. Get the job done. Tonight. _

He curved his lips into a smile when he realized the barista was standing beside him, paper and pen in hand. "A black coffee for the road, please. I have a job to do."

He shrugged into his jacket and exited the coffee shop into the night.


	5. Chapter 5

Teeth chattering, gasping for air, Aaron rounded the stone and wood cabin as snow blew all around him and wind played havoc with his hair. He spied the footprints leading from the door, Cain's footprints. Cain was inside, hiding, ready to strike if the killer came there first.

The snow was a curtain falling endlessly from the sky - a curtain he was afraid his pursuer would soon part.

Aaron knew he was being watched. But it was now or never.

Aaron kept his eyes on the trail of footsteps, staying close, careful not to step over a drop off as the terrain was rough, rocks and boulders hidden beneath the snow.

A cold wind scuttled through the trees, cutting through him, slapping his face. He was shivering so badly, he had trouble thinking, and in the near whiteout the going was slow, treacherous, the path tracks becoming more and more obscured. 

He had to keep moving, ignore the numbness in his fingers, the cold that bit at the back of his neck.

His heart drummed.

He had come this far, he couldn't turn back now. They were so close to nailing the bastard who had framed Robert. Nothing was more important than bringing his husband home.

No matter what he had to do.

He started down the hill, rounding a corner. His heart nearly skipped a beat.

Before he could move, Aaron heard a faint noise, a rumble that broke through the stillness of the forest. He stopped dead in his tracks.

The little hairs on the back of his arms lifted as the noise, the sound of an engine coupled with the whine of a four-wheel-drive, reached his ears.

"Oh, God," he whispered as the ghostly image of a truck appeared through the veil of snow. He had nowhere to run. Nowhere to hide.

Aaron blinked snowflakes from his eyes.

Jordan Weber? Wendy Posner’s boyfriend. What was he doing here? 

He was swearing. Angry. His eyes burning hellfire.

Knowing he didn’t have a prayer of outrunning Jordan, couldn’t expect to elude him, Aaron concentrated on out-smarting him. It was his only chance.

_ Keep moving. _

He was halfway to the tree when he heard the Jeep’s engine die and the creak of a door opening. The crunch of metal hinges. As if he’d pounded a fist into the side of his truck. Aaron didn’t look over his shoulder. Just ran. Putting distance between them.

_ Go, go! Faster, faster! _

Aaron’s mind was whirling, his body protesting, but he kept running.

_ Jordan Weber was the killer? _

He couldn’t wrap his mind around it, but as he ran, hoping the snowfall dropping from the sky would become his cover, he remembered how strange Jordan had acted around the village, how out of place he seemed. It all made sense now.

Jordan was moving to a jog behind him, but he’d taken time to grab some tools. A thick coil of rope was wrapped over his shoulder, a hunting knife, much larger than the one Aaron had pocketed, gripped in his strong fingers.

Terror cut Aaron to his core. Jordan intended to kill him as soon as he caught him. Aaron nearly stumbled, saw a deer flash through the icy underbrush from the corner of his eye.

_ Don’t do it, don’t let him freak you out. Think, Aaron, you can outplay this psycho. _

If only he had his phone.

Or a gun.

He cut between pine trees, darting behind them and over fallen logs, scrambling through the snow.  _ Keep running. For God’s sake, keep running!  _ He was breathing hard, cold air blistering his lungs. Both legs ached.

Gripping the knife in his right hand, he angled around a tall spruce, between two bare aspens. Cutting around a rock, he twisted his ankle. Pain ricocheted along his skin. “Oh, God!” He landed wrong, his foot hitting a tree limb buried in the snow, throwing him forward. His knees began to buckle. “Hell,” he bit out, trying to catch himself.  _ No! Stay on your feet! _

But it was too late.

He fell, his feet giving out. Down he went, over a steep embankment, into a wide gully, tumbling faster and faster, free-falling along the steep hillside, out of control, the world spinning, snow everywhere.

Using his hands as best he could, he tried to break his fall, digging his fingers into the snow, creating drag, trying to slow his speed so he would avoid the trees and rocks that loomed near the bottom of the draw.

On his back, head first, the sky shifting overhead, his arms around, hand grabbing.

_ Bam! _

His left hand smashed against something sharp.

He tried to catch himself, to grab onto a root or rock or limb – anything! – as he careened down the wash. Then he saw Jordan staring after him, running along the top of the ridge, keeping Aaron in his sights.

_ Bastard!  _ Aaron thought.

He gave up trying to stop the free-fall. Whatever lay below was infinitely safer than dealing with the killer who now realized he knew his face and could ID him.

* * *

Holland turned off the wipers and guided his Jeep into his reserved spot in the lot at Hotten P.D.

He'd spent the last four hours following a few more leads. As he had suspected, they had been pointless.

Every piece of logic still pointed to Aaron Dingle as being the culprit, but he had been adamant on more than one occasion that he had nothing to do with Liam's Balor's death.

And strangely, he couldn't even pinpoint why, but he believed the guy.

But so far their investigation was leading them nowhere. 

It was a wild-goose chase if you asked him.

Maybe the killer was long gone by now.

And they had no evidence, nothing concrete only circumstantial, to arrest Aaron.

He tore off his jacket as the inside of the office was sweltering, the thermostat hovering near eighty. "It's hotter than hell in here."

"Don't look at me," Joelle, his receptionist, said, her face red, beads of sweat dotting her forehead. "I called the repairman, but Tom isn't sure he can get anyone in until tomorrow." She fanned herself with her hand. "I don't know what else to do."

"Don't worry about it." He had bigger fish to fry. The damned heat was nothing. He tossed his jacket onto a side chair just as his cell phone rang.

"Holland," he said into his phone.

"I just got a call from Dingle's attorney," Dowe said into the phone, though the connection was faint, as if he was outside and the wind was blowing. 

"And?"

"It appears Mr. Dingle has disappeared. It took a lot of prodding, but Wright finally admitted that he knows where Aaron has gone."

"And?" Holland said again, getting frustrated.

"Mr. Dingle and his uncle have apparently implemented a plan to trap the real killer. Wright says the same person is responsible for Mr. Posner's death. They believe Sugden was framed."

"I've heard all of that already. There's no proof."

"It appears they're privy to some information that we weren't aware of," Dowe said. "I just got through meeting with Sugden in the prison. He admitted that his husband has been working with his uncle to trap the person responsible. Sugden apparently got concerned when he didn't hear from his husband for a few days. I spoke to Mr. Dingle's mother and she confirmed Sugden's suspicions. Aaron promised her not to say anything to anyone, especially cops, but she's worried about his safety. Dingle and his uncle are up at a family cabin in the woods. They're trying to lure the killer there."

"That's dangerous! What the hell is Dingle thinking?"

"Trying to exonerate his husband would be my guess."

"Get to the station now. We better get out there and check things out. Do you have an address?"

"Sugden does, but he has a condition."

Holland rolled his eyes. "Of course he does. What is it?"

"He wants us to bring him along. Holland, I think he's innocent. He doesn't seem like the type, never has. He can stay handcuffed, but he wants to be there."

Holland could feel himself giving in as he considered the alternative. The situation could turn dangerous and they could use all the backup they could get. "Fine. But he's your responsibility. You don't let Sugden out of your sight." He glanced out the window where the snow flurries were making it hell to see anything. One minute the skies started to clear, the next the wind brought new clouds and more snow.

If Sugden wasn't involved in Posner's murder, who was? And what did it have to do with Liam Balor's death? It was impossible that they were connected. Right? But his thoughts wandered down that darkly cut path and, as he poured himself a cup of coffee, he thought about motive.

If anyone had one, it was Dingle and Sugden. Nothing else made sense.

But why then did his gut tell him they weren't involved. And his instincts were never wrong.

The fact remained that Sugden had pled guilty, had been serving his life sentence for almost two years. 

But Holland couldn't ignore the feeling that Sugden was incapable of harming anyone intentionally.

If this was their one chance to solve both murders, he would have to do things Sugden's way.


	6. Chapter 6

As they drove up the slippery, snowy back roads to the cabin, Robert thought of nothing but Aaron and what he might be going through.

_ If he's still alive. _

That particular panic had been eating at him for the past two hours, ever since Dowe had picked him up. He was through waiting. If he had to tear up these rocky, frozen hills apart piece by piece, he would. He had to do something to find Aaron. 

"Don't ask me how he got the information," Robert told Dowe. He hesitated a moment. "Or how he convinced Cain to go with this ridiculous charade. He's putting his life at risk all because of me. I wasn't just going to sit in that prison cell while he's out here in the fucking cold risking his neck. We're talking about a cold-blooded murderer here, someone who killed for the thrill, and the money. I have no doubt in my mind that whoever this is has been working for Wendy since the beginning. This plan of hers was put into motion long before I hit Lee over the head with that shovel. She got lucky that I bashed the bastard's skull in and used me as a scapegoat to kill two birds with one stone."

Dowe was clearly at warring with himself. What he believed and what he didn't. "Mr. Dingle should have come to us with his suspicions."

"He had no proof, and it's not like you would have believed him anyway. With his criminal record and mine? Who would have believed a word either of us said? You're only listening now because Aaron's life is in danger and you don't want to have that hanging over your conscience."

"We agreed to your terms, Sugden. Doesn't mean we believe you. So keep your trap shut until we get there," Holland snarled from the front seat.

"You believe I'm innocent," Robert reminded Holland of his earlier words. "You know we're telling you the truth. You know something sinister is going on, and if we don't get to Aaron it could be too late. He could be hurt or dead, and his blood will be on your hands."

Holland nodded curtly as he continued to drive up the steep, snowy hill. "For some weird reason, I do believe you. I believed your husband too when he swore he was innocent when I interviewed him the first time. I still haven't figured out how all of this is connected. Mr. Posner and Mr. Balon didn't know each other as far as we can tell. What is the connection?"

"I don't know," Robert admitted. "But there is one. I promise you that."

"We've dug into both Mr. Posner's past and Mr. Balon's. We came up empty," Dowe said. "It just doesn't make sense."

"Wendy Posner," Robert said through clenched teeth. "She's the center of it somehow. She's behind the scenes pulling the strings. I know it."

"You never liked any of the Posner's," Holland reminded him. "So your opinion doesn't carry a lot of weight."

"Lee raped my sister," Robert said angrily. "And I bashed the bastard's skull in, and I've been in prison for it for two years. But I didn't kill him. Someone else did, and my husband is out there somewhere trying to prove who did. If anything happens to him--"

"We're going to find him," Dowe said. "Try and not let your imagination run away with you. We don't know if anything's happened to him."

Robert pulled out the last note Aaron had written to him, smoothed out the edges. "He told me about his plans in this letter. He knew I wouldn't be able to stop him. Then he told me he loved me. If anything were to happen to him, that he wanted me to know. I always knew," he murmured, lost in his own thoughts. 

"We're almost to the cabin. Once we get there, we'll scope it out and see what we're working with," Holland said, then turned to look back at their prisoner. "And don't you dare think about going away on your own. We brought you along, but we do things my way. You hear me?"

Snow and gravel crunched beneath the tires as Holland's cruiser wound through the drooping fit and skeletal birch trees. Holland flipped on the wipers and cursed the falling snow, though patches of blue hinted that the storm was nearly over. There were only a few miles of twisted, icy road before they reached the cabin.

* * *

Jordan ran after Aaron, steady, barely breathing hard.

_ I've got him,  _ Jordan thought,  _ and he knows it. _

Jordan watched as Aaron stumbled, then fell down the embankment. Stupid moron. Didn't he see that potential slide? Aaron fell faster and faster down a ravine as Jordan jogged around the lip of the ridge, keeping Aaron in his line of vision, staying on the trail that cut along the edge of the hill.

He heard Aaron cry out and watched as something flew out of his hand. A stick...no, Jordan realized, he had a knife in his fist! Now it was gone. Lost in the snow.

He watched as Aaron tumbled toward the bottom. Jordan found a path, never letting Aaron out of his sight.

Aaron slowed, stopped, and forced himself to his feet, but he was unsteady. Dizzy. Jordan closed the distance as Aaron staggered away.

Jordan felt a tug of satisfaction. Aaron couldn't run forever.

The snow had stopped falling, patches of blue above. Jordan vaulted over a frozen log. The thrill of the chase thrilled him. Jordan shifted the coil of rope over his shoulder and felt a little zing of anticipation in his blood, a rush of adrenaline that kept him going, his legs striding easily, his lungs beginning to burn with the cold, dry air.

How will Robert feel when the cops discover his husband's lifeless body?

Desperate? Disheartened Furious? All of the above?

_ Bring it on. _

He'll get the message, Jordan thought. Everyone's vulnerable. Even you, Sugden, you prick.

He thought back to his childhood, and the number of times his mother hit him across the bare buttocks with a slim belt that stung and bit into his flesh. How many times had she forced him to stand waiting, trembling in the corner in fear? He had quivered and cried, anticipating her attack. And as she struck, she would laugh. She savored every bit of pain she inflicted on him.

And he had taken it. All of her wickedness and wrath while his dad turned a blind eye, then poured himself into a bottle so far and so deep that his sanity fled.

_ Until at twelve I turned the tables on you. I was as tall as you were and as strong. I refused to strip. I grabbed that belt and swore I would kill you if you ever tried to hit me again. But then you had one more trick up your sleeve. One more humiliation in store for me. You walked out of the house and died less than a week later. You got the last laugh by leaving me alone to live with a drunken old man. And I got to suffer the pity and scorn of the community. I heard them talk behind my back. They all laughed at me.  _

Jordan's jaw ached just thinking about her. He ran on instinct, following Aaron, but not closing the distance.

_ Now focus. Run faster! _

He could feel his heart beating and the coil of rope jostle with his strides. His grip on the hilt of the knife never lessened and he started to close the gap, running faster, dragging cold air between his teeth, his gaze as always, centered upon his prey: Aaron Dingle.

Aaron is slowing down. Laboring. 

_ This is going to be easy. _

* * *

Weapons drawn, the cops stepped out quietly, carefully, silently, circling the cabin. Holland noticed the footprints, motioned to them as Dowe nodded.

Robert stood beside Dowe, frozen in place.

They knocked on the door. “Police! Open up.”

Nothing.

Holland and Dowe looked at each other.

Knew backup was still five minutes away. Five minutes they didn’t have.

They burst through the door, first Holland, then Dowe, with Robert behind him still in handcuffs.

The place was empty. At first, that’s what they thought until they heard the whimper from the ground in front of the fireplace.

Dowe checked the other rooms while Holland attended to the man on the ground. “Lie still,” Holland said, checking the man for injuries, found none other than a small gash on his forehead.

“Aaron,” Cain managed, his head throbbing. “He went after Aaron.”

"Who did?" Holland said.

"Jordan Weber," Cain said weakly as he clutched his side. There was a small puncture wound where Jordan had stabbed him before he had run out of the cabin.

"Wendy's boyfriend?" Holland said. 

"He's not her boyfriend," Cain said. "Turns out he's her hired hitman. The man she hired to do all of her dirty work. Turns out he's been on her payroll for years. Ever since he got out of prison five years ago."

Robert turned white. Weber was upping his game. Someone had to stop him.

The skies had cleared enough that the helicopters were up. But it wasn't enough for Robert.

"We need evidence," Holland reminded Cain. "Linking Mr. Weber to these crimes you're accusing him of."

"My back pocket," Cain said. "There's a recorder. You'll find his confession about five minutes in."

“Dowe!” Holland called. “Stay here with Mr. Dingle while I take a look around outside.”

He stepped outside and saw the tracks. “Let’s go!” Holland barked.

Together, they began to run.

* * *

_ Oh God, don't give up. Don't! _

Aaron was gasping for air, his mind racing as he tried to think of a way to save himself. Jordan was closing in on him; there wasn't much time.

The snow had stopped and he could see farther, though the sun against all the whiteness was blinding and he still didn't know how far he had gone.

If it came down to a physical struggle, he knew he would lose. Since he'd lost the knife, he had no weapon aside from a screwdriver.

He had to outwit Jordan. Somehow. But inside he was breaking. The physical toll was too much, draining him mentally.

Gasping, his heart feeling as if it would burst, he struggled forward. The trees had given way and he was in an open canyon, and ahead, an extremely flat area, surrounded by the forest.

A lake. Frozen solid. Snow covering the ice.

Maybe he could lure Jordan on it. Jordan outweighed him, and the rope he had seen him carrying was heavy, and would add even more weight. 

He was running out of options fast. Better to try anything than let the son of a bitch kill him without a fight.


	7. Chapter 7

Jordan watched Aaron run straight for the frozen lake.

_ Where does he think he'll go? Onto the ice? So he's run out of places to hide. Good. _

Jordan pushed himself, got close enough to see the panic in Aaron's eyes as he glanced over his shoulder.

_ That's right, Dingle. I'm coming. _

Aaron headed straight for the huge expanse of even landscape, sunlight glancing off spots where ice still showed through the white blanket. It was his only chance.

He cast another quick look behind him. Jordan was so close, and he was smiling, as if he finally understood Aaron's intention, then shook his head. "Stop, you stupid---"

Aaron didn't wait to hear the rest of Jordan's oath. Over the pounding of his own heart, the pulse throbbing in his brain, Jordan's voice faded.

Despite the pain searing through his body, Aaron ran. Hard. Hollowing out a trail that he could follow straight at the lake. His feet slid a little as he hit the ice, the snow slipping over the frozen water.

"No!" Jordan's voice boomed, but Aaron just kept running, feeling nothing but solid ice beneath him, heading to the middle of the lake.

If only there was a way to call someone. Tell them. But he was all alone. No one in sight, only his own ragged breathing making a sound.

Jordan had left his gun in the truck after he'd taken a shot at Cain. He should have kept it with him, if only to intimidate Aaron. 

Now he watched as Aaron ran onto the lake. God knows what part of it was frozen solid, and even in the middle there had to be several inches of ice, but still, it was dangerous.

"Stop!" Jordan commanded, but Aaron kept running, slipping and sliding through the pristine layer of snow covering the icy surface. Jordan followed. It was solid under his feet. Nothing shifted. But he stayed cautious, and listened for that cracking. "There's nowhere to go," he yelled, but Aaron didn't break his stride.

He had underestimated Aaron.

Fury burned through him. It was time to end this. Now.

To hell with caution, Jordan thought. He took off and ran as if the hounds of hell were on his heels.

* * *

Robert was mindfully aware of the seconds elapsing. Holland had told him to stay put.  _ Yeah right, like I'm really going to do that while my husband is out there somewhere being tailed by a maniac. _

"Just go," Cain said. "I know you're going to go after him anyway."

"I'm handcuffed," Robert said. "How the hell would you like me to do that?"

"Come here." Cain reached into his jacket pocket, pulled out a set of keys.

"I don't even want to know why you have a set of keys to police handcuffs in your pocket."

"Do you want my help or not?"

He did. He walked over to where Cain was laying down on the couch in front of the window and turned around. He felt the click as the handcuffs gave way.

"Now go," Cain said. "Make sure our Aaron is safe."

Robert felt a deep jab of guilt as he exited the cabin. But he couldn't concentrate on that now, he had to find Aaron before it was too late. He grabbed the pistol from the front seat of the police cruiser, tucked it in the pocket of his jacket, just in case. Then he took off in a dead run. Feeling like he was already too late he followed the tracks in the snow. His soul was heavy with dread.

What if Aaron was already gone?

What if he reached Aaron just to find his lifeless body?

He kept running, increasing his pace. He slid a bit, then saw where the tracks separated, where Aaron had fallen down the steep incline, sliding and twisting in the snow. Jordan had bigger feet, and he skirted the edge of the ledge. He followed Jordan's trail at a dead run. Tree branches slapped his face, snow dropping onto his shoulders and hair, but he sped through the forest.

Running faster, he broke across the clearing at the bottom, rushing after the prints that looked fresher, no longer covered in snow.

He was getting close, he could feel it.

Into the woods he sprinted, heading north, spying a hawk as it soared upward.

Where were they? His jaw rock hard, Robert ran steadily through the forest, closer to whatever hideous scenario the psycho had planned.

* * *

Aaron was halfway across the lake. His lungs were on fire, his thighs and calves screaming in pain.

Jordan was only a few feet behind.

Aaron hoped, prayed, for the ice to give way under Jordan’s weight, but so far it held him.

“Dingle! It’s over,” Jordan yelled, but he was breathing hard, struggling, too.

Aaron kept moving.

“I mean it.” In his hand was the knife, and he was close enough to Aaron that he could throw it at him.

Aaron kept running, zigzagging, knocking Jordan off guard. Beneath the snow the ice was slick, his feet slipping as the sun shone bright, only a few clouds remaining, the air crisp.

It was as if they were the only two creatures in the universe: a wounded man and a gasping, looming predator who was closing the gap between them. The shore-line surrounding the lake was far away, snow-covered trees glistening in the wintry sunlight.

“It’s your time, Dingle.”

“Like hell.” God, Jordan was close. Aaron’s pulse pounded in his ears, his eyes burned with the cold.

“I said, ‘It’s your time,’ now!” Jordan lunged. Thrusting his body through the air, his knife aimed, he threw himself at Aaron.

Aaron flinched, shifted quickly to one side. Sliding.  _ Crash!  _ Jordan hit him hard, but Aaron was still on his feet. “Shit.”

Aaron kept running. Sliding. Putting icy distance between them. Aaron glanced around. 

Angry as a wounded bull, Jordan pulled himself to his feet. “There’s nowhere to run. You may as well give up!”

Jordan was heading in his direction again, his face red, his eyes filled with a burning hatred. But he’d bought a little time.

Jordan was growing closer again. Aaron heard his tortured breathing.

“Why are you doing this?” Aaron yelled, trying to catch Jordan off guard, make his mind shift from its deadly purpose.

“Because it’s what I do. It’s what I’m paid to do.” He propelled himself forward again, and this time, as Aaron tried to duck away, he slipped, his feet shivering across the ice.

Aaron felt a big hand circle his ankle.

“I told you,” Jordan said, sounding smug. “It’s your time.” But there was another noise as well – the deep, sharp sound of ice cracking and splitting. “What the hell?” There, where his fingers clenched above Aaron’s foot, nearly crushing his bones, was the first splintering web of deep cracks. Jordan glared up at Aaron, his face flushed with anger.

“You’re going down,” Aaron said, and kicked him hard, aiming for Jordan’s head with his free foot.

The ice emitted a heart-stopping sound.

Beneath him, Aaron felt the mass shift. Jordan’s fingers tightened over Aaron’s ankle, twisting, and Aaron cried out as tendons popped.

It was over, Aaron knew, but if he was going to die, he was damned well taking this monster with him.

* * *

The ice was splintering, breaking, water seeping upward.

_ It’s over,  _ Aaron thought, knowing he was going to die a horrid, freezing death where his lungs would fill with water and he would never see Robert again. He had failed to save them both.

Jordan screamed as the ice gave way. He dropped the knife, tried to hold on to something, anything, his hand grappling wildly as he tumbled through the crevice, deep into the icy water. His grip on Aaron’s leg didn’t lessen and Aaron, too, was dragged toward the ever-growing hole. He kicked and fought, Aaron’s foot connecting with his head, but his handheld fast.

Slowly but surely, Jordan pulled Aaron with him, down into the frigid, deadly depths.

“Aaron!” He heard his name as he clung to the slippery surface. It was Robert’s voice, but it came from a distance. Was he dreaming?

His leg was in the frigid water and Jordan’s weight inexorably pulled him downward, within the gaping hole where he was sinking, intent on taking Aaron with him.

“Aaron! Hold on!”

Robert?

With a last frantic tug, Jordan yanked Aaron into the lake’s dark, icy depths.

“No!” Robert ran, slipped, slid, across the ice. He saw the struggle, watched in horror as Jordan Weber, holding fast to Aaron’s ankle, dragged his husband into the water. “Oh, God, no!” The ice was solid where he was, but as he ran toward the hole he saw the splinters, the deadly gashes spreading the snow apart, allowing water to surface.

Robert had to get to him. Had to save him.

Robert stripped off his jacket and beelined toward the shifting, dark waters. Overhead a helicopter flew low.

“Stand down, Sugden!” he heard from overhead. It was Holland, on a bull horn, screaming. “Robert Sugden, stand down!”

Robert reached the edge of the hole and dived in.

Aaron was drowning, thrashing, fighting the madman in the water. Jordan struck him and Aaron flung a hand at him, only to miss, to tangle his hand in the rope that was uncoiling in the darkness. Overhead there was light, distorted, and broken through the ice. They’d been sucked away from the hole, were doomed to die.

Jordan came close again and Aaron took the screwdriver from his pocket. As if in slow motion, he swung, the head driving hard into Jordan’s eye.

Blood spurted and plumed in the water.

Aaron kicked away, his lungs on fire, the water a smear of blood. He couldn’t hold on. Couldn’t reach the surface no matter how hard he kicked.

_ It’s over,  _ he thought wildly. Adrenaline caused him to kick hard, but his lungs, oh, God, his lungs were about to explode.

He thought of Robert, his husband, the love of his life. He had tried so hard to prove Robert’s innocence, to bring him back home.

All of it had been useless. 

His lungs were stretched to the limit, ever air sac within feeling as if it would burst.

Pain, searing and hot, cut through him.

_ Don’t give up! Don’t! Fight. For Robert. Your family. You have too much to live for. _

But the pain…it was too much.

Jordan, like an octopus in a sea of his own ink, was struggling wildly, but he was drifting away, from Aaron, from the rope…

Aaron let out another breath. He felt light-headed.

_ This is it… _

Aaron’s arm, the one twisted in the rope, was being pulled and his last grim thought was that Jordan Weber, the man responsible for killing Lee and Liam and framing Robert, had bound him with his deadly rope.

Aaron let out a final breath and felt his lungs start to fill.

_ No! _

Under the ice, Robert saw Aaron give up. He watched as the man he loved let out his final, dying breath.

_ No, Aaron, damn it, you’re not going to die on me! _

Tugging on the rope that had wound around Aaron’s arm, Robert pulled hard, simultaneously swimming toward the surface, to the hole that was only a few feet away. His lungs burned, but he wouldn’t give up, swimming as hard as he could. Reaching the surface, he broke through, gulping air, dragging Aaron with him, cradling Aaron’s head close to his chest as he hung on to the uncertain ice. The rescue team from the helicopter had lowered a man near them.

“Hold on,” Robert whispered into Aaron’s wet hair. “Damn it, Dingle, don’t you die on me. You got that?” His voice broke and he cursed himself for his weakness, but he kissed Aaron’s head and said, “I love you. Damn it all to hell, I love you.”


	8. Chapter 8

“You're okay.” Robert took Aaron's hand, squeezed gently. When Aaron's fingers flexed in his, relief burned through him like cold fire. “Aaron, can you hear me? God, you scared the shit out of me. You're crazy, you know that? Risking your life like that, chasing that psychopath. What the hell were you thinking?"

Aaron's world had turned white and thick and cold, so cold after being lifted from the water. Then there were shadows, shifting, receding, voices whispering his name.

He was slowly coming back down to earth.   
  
“Robert?" he managed, his eyes still closed as he clutched the bedsheets.   
  
“Yeah.” He tried to swallow, couldn't. Fear had dried up every bit of saliva in his mouth. “Yeah, it's me. I thought I had lost you."   
  
“Robert,” Aaron said again, then his white world flashed red. Pain sliced through him, long, ragged blades of it had him crying out.   
  
“Stop. I know it hurts, let me get the doctor. You need to lie still.” But the way Aaron was groaning terrified him. “Tell me if you can feel this.”   
  
Robert squeezed Aaron's leg. When Aaron nodded, Robert pressed a kiss to his forehead. Part of his throat opened again when he saw Aaron's feet move and flex. “You're a little banged up, that's all. The water was so cold, I wasn't sure how long it would take for you to get feeling back in your legs.”

Aaron was still in shock, and in so much pain, Robert thought. And his pupils were still dilated. "I wish it was me laying there and not you."   
  
“My shoulder.” Aaron tried to reach for it, fought off a wave of nausea. The pain was unspeakable, and even breathing threatened to make him retch. “Did I break it? And fuck my side hurts.”   
  
“It's just knocked out of joint.” Blood oozed from a dozen gashes on his own body he didn't even feel. He only cared about Aaron. “Hurts like hell I know.”   
  
The wrenching pain slammed into Aaron as Robert reached for the button to buzz the nurse. Aaron tried to move, escape the pain but it was useless. His eyes went glassy. Aaron closed his eyes. Agony was an icy white knife digging into muscle and bone. “I can't think. Fuck it hurts.”

"I know. I wish there was something I could do." Robert felt fucking useless.   
  
“You're here, that's enough.” Aaron felt like he was floating. Pain was everywhere, but it was dull now. “It's starting to feel better. Just hold my hand and don't let go."   
  
Robert kissed Aaron's head again. The bleeding had stopped, but he worried over the lump and broken skin. And every other part of Aaron's bruised body. "You're going to have some bruises and you'll be in pain for a while, but the doctor will get you some more medication to help."   
  
Robert studied Aaron's face, he couldn't look away. He was pale, he thought, and his pupils were still dilated. “How's your vision? Blurry?”   
  
“No, it's fine.”

While the nurse came in and gave Aaron another dose of pain medication through the IV in his arm, Robert lowered himself into the chair beside the bed.

"Let me look at you," the nurse said sweetly as she took his temperature. "Good, your fever has gone down quite a bit. But you need rest and lots of it."

Chas burst through the door, stopped, braced herself as her heart tilted. "My baby," she managed calmly, grabbing his hand. 

"I'm fine, mum." That was all he got out before the room filled with more family.

Robert didn't notice all the eyes that focused on him. All he could do was stare at Aaron. "I don't know how long he was under. Maybe two minutes." Two minutes too long. He wiped a hand over his mouth. "He's going to be fine."

"You gave us scare," Chas said. Then she looked at Robert. "Let me see your hands. You've made a fine mess of yourself." Chas snagged his wrist. His hands were frozen and covered in dirt and blood, the knuckles mangled. "You've cut them to pieces." Her eyes lifted to his, swam, overflowed as she realized what he'd done. "Robert."

"They're fine, I'm fine." Robert jerked away. He didn't want anybody's sympathy or gratitude. He couldn't breathe, wasn't sure how much longer he could stay in the room. "I've got to go back to the police station, make a statement."

When he walked out, Chas stepped out after him. 

"Chas." Vic put a hand on Chas' arm. "Let me. Please."

"He needs tending to. He shouldn't leave like this."

"He won't come," Vic said to herself as she went after her brother. "Rob." She hurried down the corridor to try and catch up to him. "Damn it, Rob, wait." She caught him by the shoulder, spun him around, and stepped back involuntarily at the molten fury that spurted out.

"Stay away from me, Vic. I can't be here."

"Listen---"

Ignoring the pain in his hands, Robert ran them through his hair. "I'm in the mood to punch something and I don't want it to be you. Stay away."

"You idiot," Vic whispered. "They don't blame you, nobody does. Why are you blaming yourself?"

"What the hell difference does it make? It was my fault that he was there, trying to play the hero. Now he's in a fucking hospital bed. He could have died." Robert's voice began to break. "If I lost him---"

"But you didn't." Vic rubbed a hand over his back, felt his muscles tense. "You saved his life."

"I'm no hero, Vic. We both know that."

"You are to me, and you are to that man laying in there. I know what it's like to love someone so much that you'd do anything to keep them safe. I know right now you feel miserable and beaten down and I also know you don't like it. You don't like feeling this vulnerable, this scared."

"I thought he was dead." Robert's shoulders shuddered. He didn't have the energy to shrug away from Vic's embrace. "I saw Jordan pull him into that icy water and I couldn't feel anything. I just ran as fast as I could and dove in after him. I was scared, so scared that I was going to lose him." He pulled back, rubbed his hands over his face, smearing blood. "His family is here now. I've got no place here."

"You're wrong. No one's shutting you out but you. Rob, you're a mess." She took a good look at the battered hands, the torn and bloody clothes. She didn't want to think about how close her brother had come to dying. "Come home with me, let me fuss over you. You look like you could use a drink, too."

"No," Robert said pushing her away. "I need to be alone."

Without another word, Vic watched him disappear around the corner and heard a door slam as he left the hospital.


	9. Chapter 9

He just wanted to be alone.

For now, he would settle for just standing in the shower and drown out the aches and pains, Robert decided as he turned the lock and stepped inside the Mill for the first time in two years. 

After he had a drink.

In fact, now that he thought about it, getting piss faced drunk was probably a much happier way to drown out the pain.

He bypassed the beer in the fridge and took out a bottle of Jack Daniels. As he poured a glass half full, he ignored the insistent knocking on the door.

"Go the fuck away," he muttered and took one long swallow. It did little to improve his mood when Chas pushed open the door.

"Well, I see you're already drowning your sorrows." She set down a box on the counter and frowned at him.

Robert lifted the glass again as Chas pursed her lips. "What are you doing here anyway?"

"I came to check on you. I was worried about you."

"You came, you checked, now go away."

She reached into the box and took out a covered plate. "Vic sent some food over. She figured you hadn't eaten anything all day." He'd only been released a few hours, and she knew he had spent those few hours at the police station giving his statement. "I asked her to let me come instead. She's worried about you."

"Nothing to worry about." He studied his hands. "I've had worse."

"I have no doubt, but you'll sit down and let me clean those cuts." She set a big bowl, bottles, and bandages on the counter. "You saved my son's life, and not for the first time. It's the least I can do."

"I can take care of myself." He lifted his glass, peered at the level of whiskey. "I've already made a good start."

Chas came around the counter and shoved him into a chair.

"Shit." He rubbed his shoulder where she'd pushed. It burned like fire.

"And watch that tongue." She busied herself filling the bowl with hot water. "I can see an infection brewing already. You still have no sense." She snatched one of his hands and got to work.

"God damn, that hurts!"

"I said watch your tongue," she scolded him. "Don't swear at me, Sugden." Her eyes stung when she saw just how badly he had damaged his hands, but her movements remained animated and not empathetically sympathetic. "This will bite some."

The burn of the antiseptic that she generously poured over his open wounds made his eyes cross and filled the air with wild curses. "Why don't you just use battery acid and be done with it?"

"Big, strong man like you, whining over a little peroxide and alcohol. Take another drink, then, as I haven't anything else for you to bite on."

Robert tipped back the glass and scowled at her. He decided to brood while she wrapped gauze over his hands. "Are you done yet?"

"For the time being. You'll want to keep those bandages dry and they'll need to be changed regularly since I assume you'll be too stubborn to go see a doctor."

"Don't need a doctor," he mumbled. He jerked his shoulder but regretted it when it throbbed. "Aaron's fine, isn't he? I know he's got enough people hovering over him."

Rising, Chas emptied the bowl in the sink and refilled it. "Take off what's left of your shirt."

He cocked a brow. "I don't think so. Ow!" he gaped, shocked when she gave his ear a hard twist.

"I'll twist more than your ear if you don't stop this nonsense. Just take your shirt off like you're told."

"Christ." He rubbed his stinging ear. "What's your problem?"

"Your hands aren't the only things you've cut to blazes. Now get your shirt off so I can see what you've done to yourself."

"What the hell do you care? I could bleed to death and you'd probably throw a party. You always hated me."

"Don't be foolish. You're a pitiful man, Sugden if you really think that. Was I mad when you got carted off to prison and left Aaron? Sure. Was I angry when you sent him those divorce papers without letting him come see you? I sure as hell was. But I could never hate you. Especially not now that you risked your own life - again! - to save his. So no, I don't hate you. I just wish you would use your brain once in a while and stop shutting people out. Aaron's not the only one that lost you, you know. I felt like I had lost a son. You may not realize it but I love you as much as I do Aaron. I know I haven't always shown it, but I do." Because he wasn't cooperating, she tugged off his tattered shirt herself.

Robert stared blankly at her. "You never said any of this to me before."

Chas shrugged as she dabbed gently at the gashes on his back. "Didn't think I needed to. Be still. You would have killed yourself for him, wouldn't you?"

Robert suddenly felt tired and beat down. He laid his head on the counter and shut his eyes. "Go away. Leave me alone."

"I won't and nobody else will either. You'll have to be the one to do it. Hold on, this is going to hurt."

He hissed between his teeth as the antiseptic bit. "I just wanna get drunk."

"I'm sure you will. But a man who would brave jumping in an icy frozen lake for his man should have enough nerve to face him sober. Now take off your pants."

"Hell no. I'm not going to---" He cursed when she twisted his other ear. "Would you stop that? Fine, you want me naked, fine."

He got up slowly, tugged off his torn jeans. "I would have gone to see a doctor if I had known what the alternative was going to be."

"That cut on your leg is going to need stitches, but I'll do what I can." 

He sat back down and shoved the glass aside. The urge to drink alcohol had suddenly disappeared completely. "You never answered me. Is he okay?"

A smile floated around her mouth, but she kept her head down. "He's hurting. In more ways than one. He needs you."

"No, he doesn't. I'm the last thing he needs."

She shook a finger at him. "I know I didn't just hear you say that he doesn't need you. After everything the two of you have gone through together and these past two years? I know it killed him to keep it a secret that you were still together. I know how torn up he was not having you here. I know there were hundreds of sleepless nights and drunk stupors. He tried to hide how much pain he was in, but Paddy and I both saw it. He went through hell just to prove you were innocent. Not many guys would stand beside their husbands the way he has. No matter how many times people tried to force him to move on, and yes I know that includes me, he refused to because the only person he wanted was you. You're lucky, Sugden, to have such a loving and loyal man on your side. Are you going to sit there and tell me you would rather be here drowning your sorrows instead of at the hospital with him after he risked his life to save your sorry behind? I love you Robert, but you're stubborn and a fool. If you can't see what is staring in front of your face, you don't deserve him."

* * *

He tried to distract himself. He jumped in the shower, ate the food Vic had sent over, but nothing could keep his mind off Aaron. How he had been barely clinging to life when he had dove into that icy, cold water. How close he had come to losing Aaron again. 

Aaron's injuries were minor considering his ordeal. He had almost died, and if it hadn't been for him diving into that water and pulling him out, Aaron might not have been alive when the paramedics arrived and revived him.

Chas insisted that Aaron was fine, that he had been examined by every doctor in the hospital and while he had more than his fair share of cuts and abrasions, bruised ribs, and torn tendons in his shoulder, he was lucky to be alive.

She called Robert a hero.

Robert hated that word. He wasn't anybody's hero. He was a coward.

But he couldn't walk away. Not even if he wanted to. The hold Aaron had on his heart always pulled him back.

He was free. All charges had been dropped against him and he would never have to step inside that cold, dingy cell again. 

Wendy had been arrested and was awaiting sentencing. There was some relief in that.

Lock the bitch up for life, he thought. There would never be a severe enough punishment for all of her crimes and the havoc she had caused in their lives. She would have done anything to cover up her tracks, and her next target had been Aaron.

You saved him, Robert reminded himself. Robert wasn't sure if and when he would ever let Aaron out of his sight again.

Jordan's body hadn't been found. Rescue attempts had failed and searches had turned up nothing. But with the spring thaw, the cops were sure that what was left of his body would rise to the surface. They would search again when the weather broke, but for now, Weber was floating in his own freezing watery grave.

Aaron's skin was pale and he felt light-headed when Robert came to his hospital room later that night after finally coming to terms with the fact that Chas had been right. He couldn't lock himself away dwelling on what had happened. Aaron needed him.

Chas was there, trying to engage Aaron in conversation, trying to get his mind around what had happened.

Aaron barely remembered anything after he'd fallen into the icy depths. His brain felt foggy, and everything was throbbing. 

He didn't want to remember anything, and his mum constantly asking him if he needed anything was starting to get on his last nerve. They were already strung tight from being poked and prodded at by doctors and nurses.

All he wanted was to see Robert, and when he had woken up he was alone. Vic told him Robert had gone home to get some rest, but Aaron knew better.

Robert was avoiding him.

"You were blue and you weren't breathing. If it wasn't for Robert dragging you out of the frozen lake and administering CPR, you would have died," Chas said from the other side of the bed, as she fussed over Aaron, fluffing his pillows and bringing him a fresh glass of water.

Aaron's throat felt like sandpaper, but he wanted to try to speak. He wanted to look at Robert, who looked uncomfortable at the way Chas was praising him. "You saved my life." He tried to reach for Robert's hand, but the IV was wedged on his hand and it hurt to move his hand. He shut his eyes and gave up, the pain too overpowering.

Robert saw the pain in Aaron's eyes and brushed his fingers against Aaron's palm. His fresh bruises throbbed, but he didn't care. He needed to touch Aaron, to know that this wasn't a dream, that they were both alive.

Unable to resist, Robert leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to his husband's lips. "I'm just glad you're okay. I don't know what I would have done if something happened to you."

Aaron managed to curve his lips a little. "Can't get rid of me that easy, Sugden. You think you would have learned that by now."

Robert grinned, tousled Aaron's hair. "And you're not getting rid of me either."

Though it hurt, Aaron lifted Robert's bandaged hands one at a time and kissed them. Robert couldn't help but lean into the touch.

Emotion swam through Robert, making him ache. No one had even undone him as Aaron did. 

Neither of them noticed Chas slip out of the room.

Aaron looked fragile, Robert thought. But he was the strongest person Robert knew.

"Why did you leave before?" Aaron asked him. "I was kind of on a high on the medication they keep pumping into me, but when Vic was by earlier she seemed worried about you. Are you sure everything is alright?"

Robert smiled. "Everything is now. I was just feeling sorry for myself. The image of you laying there all blue, barely clinging to life. It scared the shit out of me. Then seeing you laying here in this bed, it made me angry. But your mum came by the house and talked some sense into me. And bandaged my hands. Did she tell you she tore my shirt and made me take my pants off?"

Aaron lifted an eyebrow as he watched Robert prowl the room. "No, she never mentioned it."

"And she said nice things to me, like nice, nice things. She told me she loved me. It was weird."

"Why do I get the feeling that bothers you?"

"It did at first," Robert admitted. "I always thought she hated me, especially after what I did after I got locked up. But we talked it out, and I feel better about everything. It was nice to hear how she really felt about me."

"Is there something else on your mind?"

"I just---" Robert stopped pacing, hooked his thumbs in his pockets, and looked back at Aaron. "I have to tell you something. When she came to see me I was angry. At myself for almost getting you killed, for going to prison and leaving you, making you believe that I stopped loving you. I was so lost in my own head when I saw you laying in this bed earlier that I stormed out of here determined to drown myself in booze and never come back. But it was stupid and I'm sorry."

"You were blaming yourself. Rob, none of this was your fault. I went after Jordan, I concocted this plan with Cain because I wanted my husband back. I would have done anything. You didn't force me to do this. I wanted to. My brain may have been fuzzy when you ran out of here earlier, but I understand why you did it. You don't owe me an explanation. You're here now, that's what counts."

"I never would have left you," Robert murmured. "I thought you were dead in that water and I dove in after you. I've never prayed so hard in my life."

"You never left me the first time, either," Aaron murmured. "Remember? When you saved me after that car crash? You saved me then and you saved me now. You still don't think you're worthy of being with me? If you have the time I can explain to you why you are. I don't know if I could ever explain to you how much I love you, how thankful I am that you're here."

"You don't need to make a deal about it." But he was smiling as he said it. "You're the one lying in that bed. Let me fuss over you and tell you how grateful I am that you're here, that we're together. I never thought we would get to be here again. I never thought I would ever get out of that place. But you, you risked everything to get me out of there and I'll never be able to repay you for that."

"There's nothing to repay. You would have done the same thing if it was me."

"No question in your mind?"

"No, because I know how we feel about each other, how we've always felt about each other. Nothing ever came close, and nothing ever will."

"I can't wait until you get out of here," Robert murmured. 

"Me either. We have a lot of time to make up for. I really wish I could kiss you right now, but my lips still hurt like a bitch." Oh hell, he thought. It was worth the pain. He leaned up and fixed his lips hotly onto Robert's. "Totally worth it," he said with a grin.


	10. Chapter 10

**_Epilogue - April 12, 2022_ **

They got the news the morning Aaron was discharged from the hospital.

Aaron's stay in the hospital had lasted longer than he had wanted, but due to an accelerated heart rate and elevated pulse, the doctors made the decision to keep him in for a few extra days to monitor him just to make sure there weren't any complications with his recovery.

He had grumbled, complained, and would have kicked and screamed if his legs still weren't so banged up and sore.

The news they'd been waiting for, praying for, to finally put an end to the nightmare they'd been living in for weeks, came directly from Holland himself.

At least he had the courtesy to call them before the story was all over the news.

Which it was.

The media coverage, drawing attention to the horrific ideal Aaron had gone through and the psychopath that had almost killed him, wasn't something either of them wanted but they knew to expect it. It was a huge story, especially now that Jordan's body had been recovered and Wendy had pled guilty.

_ Jordan Weber, the man responsible for the premeditated murders of Lee Posner and Liam Balor, and who attempted to murder a third victim, whose identity has not been revealed, has been found. The lifeless body of the man was discovered after three weeks of being underwater and has now surfaced. As previously reported, Wendy Posner has been arrested in connection with these murders, as the mastermind behind the killings. Her son was the first victim. The second victim was known to the Posner family, but the motives are unknown. Ms. Posner has pled guilty and is awaiting sentencing. Robert Sugden, who had been wrongfully convicted of Mr. Posner's murder, has been released after two years in prison. He has since reunited with his family and is living in Emmerdale. We attempted to reach Mr. Sugden for a comment, but he declined. We will keep you updated as this story develops. _

Aaron turned off the TV and tossed the remote on the bed out of frustration. 

Aaron just wanted to hide under the covers and never come out. The memories of that night crept in, threatening to swallow him whole.

He wanted to scream, throw things, break things. 

He needed to get out of the house, get some fresh air. He could feel the panic attack looming. He had learned to recognize the signs.

Robert was at the door of their bedroom when he'd heard the tail end of the media reports. Then he saw Aaron's face turn white and he grabbed Aaron's arm before he fainted or worse. "Sit down," he said, and pushed Aaron back on the bed. "Take a couple of deep breaths. One, two. There you go. Are you okay?"

He knew it was that stupid news report that was the trigger for the panic attack that was starting to come in waves. First, he just felt dizzy, then the wave of nausea hit and he crawled back into bed and pulled the covers over himself. 

"I'll go get you some water. Stay there." Robert hated to leave Aaron like this, but the color was creeping back in his cheeks, but he knew Aaron was dehydrated and if he didn't get some liquid in his system soon things would get a lot worse and they would be looking at another trip to the hospital, which Robert knew Aaron wouldn't like, and would probably have to be dragged there kicking and screaming if it came down to that.

Almost an hour passed before Aaron had the strength to get out of bed. He managed to fall back asleep for an hour, the knots in his stomach lessening.

He had just dragged himself into the bathroom and was splashing cold water onto his face when Robert came back in the room.

"How do you feel?" Robert asked, leaning against the door jamb that separated their bedroom from the bathroom. He kept his distance, not wanting to crowd Aaron and bring on another attack.

"It's over now. I'm fine. Look, I'm sorry. I know I haven't exactly been a ray of sunshine. I'm surprised you haven't murdered me yet."

"Don't even joke about that, it's not funny. Do you know how close I came to losing you? You've been through a lot, we both have, but I'm worried about you. I know you hate being stuck in that hospital bed, but you're home now and you're recovering. It's okay to be angry, it's okay to be frustrated. Hell, I'm still mad as hell that I spent two years of my life in prison for something I didn't do, but I won't let it control my life. Not when I have my whole future with you to look forward to. But I can see that you're struggling. Just tell me what I can do to help."

"You're doing it, trust me." Aaron fell into his arms, held on tight, needing that connection. "I thought once they found his body I would feel better, but I don't. I just feel numb."

"It's just going to take time. You almost died. I almost lost you. You don't think I have a hard time with that? That I don't wake up in the middle of the night just to make sure you're still here?"

"I'm not going anywhere. You're stuck with me. The same goes for you. You're not allowed to go anywhere, not at least for fifty years. I couldn't deal with it again if I lost you."

"You're not going to lose me. I mean it this time. Now take these." Robert handed him two white pills. "And then jump in the shower. It might make you feel better."

Aaron looked at him suggestively. "Care to join me?"

"Don't tempt me. You're still recovering. Go, before I change my mind."

"Maybe I want you to."

"And I want you to be able to stand up tomorrow, and you won't be able to if I follow you in there."

Aaron sighed and grabbed a clean pair of clothes from the bedroom and walked back into the bathroom. "Fine, but tomorrow I'm not taking no for an answer."

* * *

Aaron turned on the hot water and jumped in the shower. What he hadn't expected to see as soon as he reached for the soap was Robert already half-naked taking off his shirt.

"Change your mind?" Aaron said.

Robert looked him up and down on the other side of the glass. "Maybe."

A shiver ran down Aaron's spine as he watched his husband strip down. He held open the glass shower door. "Come on then. God, I smell like the fucking hospital still."

"I can help you with that." Robert stepped inside the shower.

Walking out of the bathroom with a towel around his hips, Aaron felt human again. The foreplay in the shower helped a little too, he thought. But Robert refused to take things any further than that, offering promises of finishing what they started in their bedroom later that night.

Aaron got dressed, ran a hand through his wet disheveled hair, and didn't bother to try to tame his messy curls.

He heard his phone ring on the bedside table where he'd left it. He wasn't ready to face anyone, but knew he couldn't keep avoiding people. 

"Yeah?" he said, nestling the phone between his ear and shoulder as he walked downstairs.

"I just saw the news," Chas said. "Are you okay?"

"Fine." He didn't want to admit that it bothered him. How could he explain why it upset him when he didn't understand it himself?

"At least it's all over now. You can finally move on with your life, and put this awful ordeal in the past."

Aaron wasn't sure if it was that easy. "We're getting there. It's just a lot to deal with, the aftermath of it all." It was strange, he thought. After two years Robert was home and that felt natural, it felt right, like no time had passed at all. But almost being killed by Jordan had taken its toll on the both of them. He wondered if either of them would ever be the same.

"If you need anything, you know where we are," Chas said gently. "Maybe if you and Rob are feeling up for it, you could stop by the pub later."

"I'll check with him when he gets back. He went over to see Vic."

"How is he doing?"

"Settling back in. He still feels guilty about what happened. He thinks it's his fault, which I've told him numerous times it isn't."

"I can only imagine what he's dealing with. I know he was really worried about you after he found out about your little plan. You scared him."

"I didn't want to, but I was out of options. I did what I had to do. He understands why I did it."

"Just take care of each other, okay? The rest will fall into place. Things will get better."

"I know, mum. Thanks. I'll let you know later about tonight."

* * *

Later that night, they stopped by the pub for what they thought would be a quick pint, but they ended up being coerced into sliding into a booth at the back of the pub with Chas and Paddy who wouldn't stop asking questions. Before long dozens of other friends and family showed up to their table uninvited to congratulate Robert for his heroics and Aaron for having survived his ordeal at the hands of a murderer.

They had just wanted one night where they didn't have to think about that night, but it was proving impossible.

And that, Aaron rationalized, was why he didn't refuse when someone offered him another drink.

It was dark when they finally managed to sneak out of the pub without anyone noticing or stopping them to talk. God, Aaron thought, in a drunken daze, he was tired of talking.

As they walked through the front door of the Mill, Robert realized Aaron was drunk on champagne. He cursed Chas for filling his husband's glass one too many times during the night. And Robert was pretty sure Paddy had snuck a few pints under his nose, too.

"I can't believe your mum kept bringing out more champagne," Robert muttered as he closed the door behind them. "Look at the state of you."

"I enjoyed it," Aaron said shrugging his shoulders.

"You enjoyed it a little too much."

"Mum was the one that kept filling my glass."

"And don't get me started on Paddy. I saw him sneaking all those pints under your nose. But no one forced you to drink those either." But he had to admit that the alcohol seemed to have helped Aaron relax so he left the subject alone. Robert slung his jacket over the back of the couch then drew Aaron closer. He lowered his head, keeping his eyes on Aaron's when their lips brushed. "Upstairs?"

"Yeah." He'd only been waiting all bloody day. A little unsteady, Aaron followed him upstairs.

Once up in their bedroom, Aaron could feel the nerves. They hadn't made love in two years. "Today was..." He walked towards Robert as he spoke, his heart hammering. "A hard day, but tonight being out with you I realized that all that fear, all that anger I felt earlier was gone. I can't wait for things to go back to normal. Back to work, back to living our regular everyday lives. That's all I want now."

"Me too," Robert said. "Jimmy wants me back in the company. Looks like I have a job to go back to, too. We could use a little bit of boring in our lives after these last hellish two years."

"Yeah," Aaron agreed. "But that's tomorrow. You made a promise to me earlier."

"I did?" Robert said teasingly.

"Yeah, you know you did. Stop playing coy." Aaron looked down at his hand, twirled the silver wedding band around his finger. "Robert." He curled his fingers around Robert's wrists, and wondered that the need pumping through him didn't burn through the tips and singe his flesh. "If I fumble a little, blame it on this okay?" He lifted up his injured hand and sighed when Robert placed soft kisses on it.

Aaron was nervous, too, Robert realized. Good. That put them on even ground. With his eyes on Aaron, he began unbuttoning his shirt. He tossed it to the ground, exposing Aaron's skin inch by inch. The curve of his neck and shoulder still enticed him, so he lowered his head, brushed his lips there. When Aaron shivered, arched, Robert indulged himself, nibbled along his spine, his shoulder blades.

When Robert turned Aaron to face him, Aaron's breath had already quickened.

Aaron had expected that the blast of passion that had exploded between them every time they kissed to still be there, but the intensity of it overwhelmed him. And was undone by the tenderness.

Robert nibbled his way across his jaw. "You okay?"

Aaron's head fell back, inviting his husband to explore the exposed line of his throat. "Never been better," he managed.

Robert's hand, strong, patient, skimmed up Aaron's sides back up to his shoulders. "I've imagined touching you like this again when I was in prison. Drove myself crazy imagining it."

"You're doing a pretty good job of driving me crazy now." Aaron pushed Robert's shirt aside, tossed it to the floor, slid his hands over the hard muscles of Robert's stomach.

But Robert eased him back. He had no intention of rushing this. 

Robert shifted his gaze back to Aaron's face, watched him as his hands roamed down Aaron's torso, along his hips, stroked up his thighs. "You've never been sexier to me," he whispered.

Aaron's hands were far from steady as he let his own fingers explore that tough wall of muscle.

They both quivered as they fell to the bed.

The kiss was long and deep, warming their bodies from the inside out. Aaron sighed into it, into his husband, and wrapped his arms about him. This, he thought, this was where he was meant to be. He felt dizzy and drunk. And his husband laying underneath him was erotic. He wanted to touch, to taste everything. All of him. It had been so long.

More and still more they gave and they took. A little greedier, a little faster. As desperation increased, they dragged pants impatiently down hips, tossed them to the floor. 

Beat for beat they moved together, eyes locked, breath tangled, and ragged. Aaron's hands groped Robert's, gripped. The feeling of flesh to flesh, the pulse of heart to heart, solid and real.

And when the wave rose up to swamp them both, Aaron leaned down and kissed his husband.

Robert lay limp as melted wax, eyes closed, lips curved, and took pleasure in watching his husband drift off to sleep. He found the energy to turn his head and nuzzled Aaron's neck. "I love you," he whispered.

Not yet asleep, Aaron pulled Robert closer. "I love you too."

"Are you okay?"

No, he wasn't okay, Aaron thought. He was better than okay.

"My husband's finally out of prison and home where he belongs. Of course, I'm okay. In fact, I'm perfect."

Robert smiled. "So am I."

Aaron could already feel the desire building up again. He reached for his husband, ran a finger up his chest. "You're not tired, are you? We've got all night."

Robert fell into the kiss. "We've got forever."


End file.
